This post has been a long time coming. I took most of 2019 off from blogging–lack of motivation, lack of content, and I’ve just been in a rut for most of the year. 2018 was easily the coolest year of my life, full of new experiences and adventures, so it was pretty tough not really having any of that this year. I know, I should be thankful to be so lucky to have traveled the way I have and seen the places I have seen…but is that really supposed to come with feeling so trapped?
After months and months of consideration and thinking about pulling the plug, I decided that it was finally time to do what was right and necessary for me. I had been eyeing flights to a number of different places–South America, Africa, Southeast Asia…so many choices! I made a split second decision to hit “confirm and book”. Afterwards, I definitely had thoughts of “oh fuck, what did I just do???”, but after the 24h cancellation period ended, I felt a strange sense of calm wash over me. There was no turning back, since I could no longer cancel my flights and I was not about to throw away $500USD and not go!
Quick story time: spring of 2018, I had planned on spending 2 weeks in Thailand–flights and hostels booked and all! At the time I was working for a wonderful organization, and long story short, I was offered what would have equated to a FT position in the summer in place of a colleague of mine who had to take care of some personal things. I was ecstatic to have this opportunity, so I ended up cancelling my Thailand trip in favor of squeezing in a longer European solo backpacking trip that I had already planned out as well. Unfortunately upon my return, I was laid off due to the volatile political climate in the US, but could do nothing but set my sights on the future.
Fast forward about a year and a half and here I am – days out from leaving my cushy office job in favor of a couple months of just winging it. And I cannot WAIT for it. I couldn’t be going further out of my comfort zone, but that just makes me more excited for it. Last time I left on a long trip, I thought that I’d be going right back to the daily life I had gotten so used to. This time, I’ll be unemployed and ready to take on new opportunities and struggle that I know will be waiting for me when I’m back.